A Thousand Words
by monoxide girl
Summary: InuYasha, Kagome and Kikyou's thoughts on the love triangle they're all involved in. [Threeshot][InuKag, InuKik][Complete.]
1. InuYasha

_Disclaimer: Don't own Inu, Kikyou or whoever else appears. xD Nor do I own the title, actually._

_A/N: I'm bored. And so I write a one-shot. xD Good plan, ne? Heh. I've been toying with this idea and I think it'd be fun to finally do. Beware: Fluff ahead!. ) The title is directly taken from Savage Garden's song; "A thousand words" because I think it would suit. )_

_On with the show!_

**A Thousand Words**

_Dead Punk Girl_

_InuYasha's Point of view._

You can call me crazy, you can call me a two-timer, and you can call me the biggest asshole in the world. I love two women, and I'm not going to tell you I don't. Because on top of being a crazy, two-timing asshole, I'd be a liar.

They're a lot alike, these two girls. One of them makes me so mad I could strangle her. One makes me so sad I want to break down and cry. One of them takes care of me when I hurt, and the other makes me hurt. One can make me smile when something is bothering me, one doesn't even try.

Well, when I do think about it, the only things they hold in common are their looks. They're both so pretty. And their talent with a bow and arrow. I'm always astounded by how fast one learnt how to use it, actually. The other, you'd think she was born with an arrow notched back.

I can't pick favourites between them and I don't intend to try. I think I'd go insane if I had to. I'm happy with them both being mine, though I worry that one of these days they're both going to disappear from my life. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have one of them with me.

I can't imagine life without them. I think, if that whole betrayal crap hadn't taken place, I'd be a different man. Way, way different. Though, according to the one, I don't act like a man. She says I act like I'm 5 years old.

What a brat, hey?

That's okay, though. That 'brat' makes me smile to no end, even if she doesn't see it. If I had to choose who I'd be with for the rest of my life, I think I'd pick her.

She likes me for me.

Not because I'm half human, not because I can make her life easy.

I make her cry, I call her names, and I treat her like she's the dirt beneath my feet…

And still…

She likes _me_ because I'm _me_.

That's a nice thought.

The other, however, she doesn't want me for me. She's never wanted me to be myself. I had to be a human, or things wouldn't work. She made that clear, I think, at the beginning.

She doesn't like me for me.

Somehow, I think things became clearer on who I'm intending to spend my life with.

When thinking about it, I do know.

I don't want the one that doesn't know how to smile. I don't want the one who doesn't know how to laugh. I don't want the one who can only see the bad things in a good situation.

I want the one whose smile could put the sun to shame. I want the one who laughs even when things are bad. I want the one who can see great things in a horrible situation.

I want the one who makes me happy, the one who takes care of me, worries about me.

I want the one who loves me…

But still, I go to _her_ like a dog. I'm seeking her love, her acceptance and I don't want it. I hurt the one I do love. I make the one I love so much it hurts, cry. And I can't ever change that, I don't think.

Because I'll always be a man who's torn between two people who are so much alike they're opposites.

And if I told you any different, I'd be a liar now, wouldn't I?

Yup.

My name is InuYasha and I'm in love with two women.

Their names?

Kagome and Kikyou.

_A/N: Actually, there are 613 words in total, not 1000, but we'll forget that, eh? ) I was going to put Kagome's thoughts on the situation but I thought, nah. Personally, I think it may ruin the whole damned thing. And the point of this; which is my thoughts on what the hell he's thinking when he bounces back and forth. ) Simple, eh?_

_Well, that's all I wanted to say. HURRAY FOR ONE-SHOTS THAT OCCUPY A STUPID FAN-GIRL'S MIND!_

_P.S: I think I said 'thoughts' or a form of that at least 8 times in that crummy A/N... xD What a versatile word!_

_P.P.S: XD With the author's note and all, there are 801._


	2. Kagome

_Disclaimer: You know the drill._

_A/N: I'm bored. And since this story could use more…I figure I'll add a chapter on Kikyou and Kagome's point of view. I wasn't going to post anything else on this, originally, but I don't see why not. Thanks to all the reviewers; and thanks to animegirl622 for her suggestion of continuing…xD If she hadn't said anything, chances are I wouldn't be writing this. _

**A Thousand Words**

_Dead punk Girl_

Have you ever hated someone so much that it makes you want to scream and scream until you turn blue in the face? But, in the same instant, have you ever loved that same someone so much that it makes them the only thing on your mind, no matter where you are?

I have.

And let me tell you this; it sucks. A lot. I'm fifteen years old; he should know how I feel. I make it obvious enough! But his skull is so thick, it puts cement to shame.

I'm not much better, to tell you the truth, and you can ask anyone about that.

He's arrogant, though. Yup, I'm in love with an arrogant, two-timing, crazy, pig-headed, jealous, egotistical, cruel, asshole of a man. And I wouldn't have it any other way, thank you very much.

Oh, if you take away all those bad traits of his, he's a great guy. He's sensitive, intelligent, determined, very brave, considerate, loving and completely devoted. There's only one thing I'd change about him and that's her.

At times, I hate her. I hate her so much because no matter what I do, no matter how goddamned appealing I am, she's always there to show me up.

And at other times, I can understand why she does what she does; why she clings to what they used to have all those years ago.

And it's not all her fault; he's just as guilty as she is. If he would just give her up as well, she'd go away, or that's what I keep telling myself.

But maybe I'm contradicting myself? I was given the choice to give her life or let her die. And I saved her; I took out all the poison in her broken body. Why? I don't know, not even now. She asked me that, too.

It isn't really like she was alive when I did that, she was just a psycho's creation, made to be used to find the scattered shards of the shikon jewel. She lost any life in her years ago.

My response to her was that there are people who would miss her too much; mainly him. I still remember how he reacted when he found her broken bow and I still wonder if he'd have that reaction if it were me that was sent plummeting over some cliff. I'd like to think that'd he'd go search for my body, or what's left of it, like he did with her.

Even if he won't, that wouldn't change things between us. At first, the thought that he may choose her over me made me want to be sick and just hide away forever. But when I realized that she and I were so much alike in our looks, abilities and taste in men, I was a lot more forgiving with them.

It's not so much their being together that bothers me, it's the secrecy they use. He can never just tell me directly that he's going to her; instead he sneaks around like a dog that's just chewed up a slipper or your favorite shoe after it's been done.

I know he lies and hides things from me to keep me from being hurt, and I suppose I should be more grateful then I am. I mean, I don't know what I'd do if he ever said he was going to go see her, possibly kiss and hold her and tell her how much he loves her.

Probably have a nervous breakdown and sit him into the next century.

One day, I will have a breakdown and do something I regret. I know I will, after all, how much can one girl take?

You'd think I'd be smart and just give up on him, wouldn't you? You'd think I'd just toss him aside and find someone new right? But I can't do that, because I love him and I know, deep down, that he loves me, too.

Even if he loves her, too. If anyone can handle being in love with two women, it's him. Because no matter how gruff he acts outside, he's like a giant, walking marshmallow.

That's why I love him.

And that's why I put up with him and his immaturity.

That's why I deal with him not being able to decide which of us he loves more.

Because he has to be the most amazingly wonderful man I've ever met. And even if he's not always nice to me, and even if he hurts me with his constant woman-jumping, it could be worse. He could hate me, like he claimed he used to.

Oh well.

I love him, anyway. And I wouldn't change a hair on his head. Even if he makes me want to scream until I turn blue in the face. Because, he still makes me fall in love with him more and more every day.

InuYasha has to be the greatest guy I know.

And nothing, not even Kikyou, will get in the way of us. I won't let her take him away.

I just love him too damned much.

_A/N: Dunno if I went overboard with that; dunno if it even sounds like Kagome. Don't care much, either. I really tried to make her sound mature, because she really is. Or, at least, I think she is. Anyway, hoped you enjoyed that…It's a bit shorter then my InuYasha one, sadly. But she's a lot harder to write. For me, anyway._


	3. Kikyou

_Disclaimer: Said it numerous times before._

_A/N: It's late. I'm tired. I'm not wanting to sleep; even though I know I should. I'm finishing my Thousand Words one-shot. Yes. Right now. The final chapter is in Kikyou's point of view. God, this keyboard sucks._

_Anyway, Let's get this party started! _

…_Joy. I just discovered this computer has no Internet connection. So posting this will be harder then I though. Damn._

**A Thousand Words**

_Dead punk Girl_

People call me tragic. People tell me I don't belong. And, more then that, they expect me to do and be things I don't think I can do or be. They want me to give up my life, to vanish. But I can't. They want me to give in, to be weak, to be scared. And, as much as I hate to admit it, I am all those things, sometimes. We're all scared sometimes.

I wait for him to come find me, even if I don't want to see him. I wait for him to tell me that he'll protect me, even if I don't want him to do anything of the sort. I can protect myself, after all.

Or, that's what I've been telling myself all along.

Maybe everything is a dream; it's so surreal it must be. How can the man I love not be with me; how can I not be me anymore? And how is it she was able to sneak her way into his heart so quickly and so easily?

Is it because she is me?

Is it because we are one and the same, even if I am myself, and she is herself?

…Does that even make sense?

Somehow, it does, even if I don't want it to. I don't want to admit that my time is up. I don't want to let him go to her. I don't want to let the world fade.

And why should I? Why did all this have to happen to me? What have I done that is so horrible, so wrong, that I deserve this eternal damnation?

Maybe it's fate? Maybe some God hates me? Maybe it's because I chose to love him, even if I knew it was wrong, and I knew it was forbidden. No one told me not to love him, but…you get the idea.

I can't decide what I hate more about this; watching her have him, watching this girl that is a pale shadow of myself have my lover, or not being able to have him, simply because we are no longer of the same world.

I always thought we were the same, he and I. He was trapped in a perpetual fight, always having to battle for what he desired. And I: trapped by the jewel, forced to give up my sense of humanity and my sense of identity. We were one soul, simply split into two bodies, one human and one not.

I thought I could fix things. I thought I could use my source of misery to end the pain in our lives. I thought I could take away the small differences between us to better our lives.

Was that wrong of me?

Was it selfish?

I wanted to make the things wrong in our lives right. If he was human, and if the jewel was gone, we could be happy! I still believe that, even now.

How could something that was supposed to be so perfect, so wonderfully beautiful, go so horribly wrong?

I wonder, even if it is fifty years later, why I couldn't do it. Why I couldn't kill him, but rather seal him away. Was it because I knew that she would bring him back? Was it because, even if the ache of betrayal and the pain of the wound he gave me burnt through my body, I still loved him with all I had and trusted him wholly?

I don't know.

And to this day, I wish I did.

When that witch first awakened me, I couldn't understand why he was there. Why would he bother, if he hated me enough to betray me like he did?

Slowly, I realized, though, he loved me as much as he did that night he held me close and whispered those promises to me. And then she was there, too, loving him in her own, secret and silent way. And he loved her in that same secret way.

But how can he? How dare he! There are so many things I desire to tell him, so many things I wished he knew.

Then there is the other man who lusts after me; the whole reason all this happened. I hate him. I hate him almost as much as I am certain I hate her.

They're both so much alike; they both took my love away from me, and they both keep him away from me. He's the devil in disguise and she's a little devil whore, a girl who bounces around in clothes that can barely be called such.

Honestly, I don't actually hate her.

I wonder if they would be together if I were not around? Who is stopping their relationship from going any further?

I'm sure it's him. He's still devoted to me, even if my body is a sham of clay and grave soil. He still loves me, even if I must devour the souls of the dead to keep this fake body of mine from failing, and eventually turning into dust.

It's odd how things turn out.

Even if he isn't the one that ultimately caused my death, it still feels that way. I know who did it; it wasn't him, it wasn't her, it wasn't the man I took care of. It was that woman who despised me so much she would curse me. Had her hate not existed she would not have cursed me to love him, and I wouldn't have fallen like I did. I may have loved him, in the end, but not so much I would give up my own life.

That jewel could have saved me, I know. But I believed he would be there waiting for me. He wasn't; his soul was elsewhere, bound to the tree and his earthly body. He's such a free spirit, I doubt he would have come after me. And if he had, I doubt he would have stayed.

Sometimes, I wonder what he would do if I were to simply give up. Would he give up, too? That girl saved me from giving up. She healed my deep wounds, sucked the poison from my soul.

'There are people, who would miss you too much,' was all she would tell me when asked her why.

I know whom she meant. Him. Would he miss me? I'm certain I'm her only romantic rival, if you can call me that, so why did she do what she did?

I don't know what I would have done, had the roles been reversed. I'm assuming I would save her; she's so young.

Are we really that much alike?

He said that I took her soul, and that I should give it back. Isn't it mine? Did I not have it first? If I did not die, would she be without a soul? Would she even exist if the betrayal never took place? I suppose she would, I eventually would die. No one; not even youkai; is immortal. Nothing lasts forever.

That's a lie, I know.

Even if he doesn't stay with me, even if he eventually goes with her for good and I am forgotten, I will still love him. I will love him for all time.

Time stands still for people like me. There is no future, there is no tomorrow. There's barely a today. Only yesterday remains. And my yesterday is him, loving me and I, loving him right back.

My yesterday is InuYasha. My today is InuYasha. And I want to think; no, I want to believe; my tomorrow will be InuYasha, as well.

Even if I have to share him with the reincarnation of myself.

Even if I have to share him with the girl who crosses time and space to be with him.

Even if I have to share him with Kagome.

…Not that I do, mind you. And I don't really intend to, either.

And don't try to tell me I can't be selfish; I can, and I will. I deserve to think of myself now that I'm not among the living.

I love you, InuYasha

And somehow, I think our time together is gone and I doubt we can get it back.

And I'm fine with that, for some reason.

_A/N: I hope I don't get too many flames from Kag/Inu shippers. I do like Kag/Inu better then Kik/Inu. The last line expresses my thoughts on this pair; they're over, they're time together has passed. He can't ever completely stop loving her because she was the first woman; no, person; to show him kindness aside from his mother, but that doesn't change the fact that she is dead, and eventually she will have to return to the world of the dead. And that doesn't change the fact that the betrayal did happen, and even if it was in the past and they're over it, it's always going to be there in their mind. Wounds that big don't heal. _

…_Okay. I need to stop and sleep. Badly._

_Damn. This one is the longest with 1, 372 words. Why can I not get exactly one thousand words? Bah._


End file.
